Book meme mama

I've been tagged, not in the recess playground manner, nor in a Banksy work. Thank you Brandon for trying to get me to post more often, but your ploy won't work! Except for right now. Here's how this shet is going down: a) grab the nearest book of one hundred and twenty-three pages or more, b) turn to page one hundred and twenty-three, c) find the first five sentences, d) post the next three sentences, and e) tag five people. In the face.

We had hundreds of invitations that the limited time did not allow us to accept. We were looked upon as brothers, with the color of our skins as something of an asset. But the strongest bond of fraternity was the common cause of minority and colonial peoples in America, Africa, and Asia struggling to throw off racism and imperialism.

This is from Martin Luther King Junior's autobiography, describing his pilgrimage to India. I've noted this before, but he was a huge fan of Ghandi. I actually haven't gotten this far in the book, so it totally ruined that part of the story for me. Not really.

I actually haven't been reading that much lately. My schedule isn't that conducive to having a whole lot of free time. And the free time that is to be had is spent doing very, very little. I'm not entirely sure how it's possible to do so little.

I was supposed to tag five people, but I'm not going to, because if you don't want to do it, I'm not going to make you. But if you want to, please pass along this "book meme" and think of me. Coming soon: thoughts on the future of the EHBS as inspired by past, present and non members. you have my love.

There will be snacks

I was inspired yesterday. Such are the days when one sits in front of the television for far too long because it's all snow and slush outside. During one of the many commercial breaks I laughed at the Aflac orangutan and was reminded of my friend Ryan's obsession with helper monkeys. It was then that I knew what I was to do that day: I had to post a Facebook marketplace listing: "Helper Monkey wanted".

A house of guys is in need of one helper monkey for custodial and entertainment purposes. Must provide valid certification and licensing, as well as proof of training. Monkey must be polite, as well as housebroken. If conditions are met we are willing to pay up to ten thousand Iclandic Kronas for said monkey. Please, only authentic response. Thank you.

This posting was proof-read, and contributed by myself, Seiler, JJ and Julie, and we all thought that it was quite professional and creative enough to elicit some responses. We were not wrong; within an hour I received this response from a random Dubuque student:

i have 3 helper monkeys that i am willing to sell. they are a rare breed of black monkey that sing, dance, and never sleep. they provide great entertainment (especially around mating season). they come from a line of previous slave monkeys, but are now freed. they will work only for weed and food. they are house broken, but do occasionally miss the toilet (who doesn't). they also have not yet mastered flushing yet, but i feel as though they are one the verge of a break through. they try to communicate by screaming what seems to be a long lost language, or made up. if you have any interest in these monkeys please feel free to contact me.

I figured that this posting would be the source of a great number of clever and hilarious responses, but this is a sad story. Kind of. This morning, I checked my email in anticipation of more responses, only to see this notice from Facebook:

Hello,
Your listing Helper Monkey was removed from Marketplace because it was reported by our users as being inappropriate, possibly for violating the Marketplace Guidelines. Please note that continued inappropriate postings may result in account termination. If you have any questions or concerns, you can visit our FAQ page at http://www.facebook.com/help.php?page=62

The Facebook Team

Seriously? Come on! Was someone actually offended over my desired use of a helper monkey? Is not this the United States of America? Can we not choose to use lesser creatures however we see fit? I ought to call the ACLU. Whatever.

Since Facebook and the Weather Channel have deemed it necessary to never pull out of these winter blues, I give you two fine sources of laughter: first, go to youtube and search for "trigger happy tv" and proceed to laugh for the next thirty minutes to an hour. Second, for those of you who miss the Bluths, go here and be happy. Me? I'm going to make a three year plan for the next two years. you have my love.

The state of the EHBS

Status: dying, but not dead, i.e. I'm still single, Bob's still single, Graham and Brad are still single. However, the impending loss of RyJo weighs upon our once mighty shoulders. The blueness of this winter has undoubtedly compounded my frustrations, but still I manage to exist, excel, and sleep well at night. One never knows, this may be my last Day of Valentines as a member of good standing within the EHBS*. Only time will tell, or perhaps Desmond could tell me. Hmm. Regardless, this Vday, for me, will be spent in class, running and celebrating the greatness of LOST. If you really want to be my Valentine, give me a call, I'll see what I can do.

Anyway, since I didn't post the most recent odds directly after they were established, I figured that today was such a day to do so. These were compiled on New Year's Day with the help of Bobby Ogata-Grothendick and Ryan Rockford Johnson. Do enjoy.

To become engaged
RyJo 3-2
Pranga 4-1
Bob 7-1
Travis 9-1
Graham 10-1
Nate Britcher 11-1
Zab 13-1
D. Bradley 15-1

To become pregnant (approximately, cause that'd be weird)
Gates (2nd) 3-1
Martins (3rd) 4-1
Boes 7-1
Gustines (2nd) 8-1
Grabhers 8-1
Morrisons 9-1
Overbays 11-1
Britchers 20-1
Pai's 30-1

The more astute readers of this blog will note that our last odds [Reigle engaged, Gustines with child] were dead on. Also noted, my odds remained at 9-1 while RyJo took the obvious place as favorite. But I'm going to see what I can do to pull off the come-from-behind victory. All I really need is two weeks, right? Right. you have my love.


* For the Unawares, the EHBS is the Evangelical Homiletic Bachelors Society, founded on Vday in oh-one. Of the four founding fathers, only I stand in good standing - Andrew and Matthew iVan are married, whilst RyJo is seemingly headed to the same end. Go Bears.

Chickenthug7

I was looking for this and ended up reading several months worth of blog posts. I used to be witty, funny even, and maybe even clever. Plus I got a lot more comments. So it goes. Seriously though, it's strange to see how much has changed from those days, and though they were good days, it doesn't mean that the change was all that bad. Idealism was overrated back then, now it's underrated. Last night was good: JJ, RJ and I sat in the back of 212 and laughed a lot for several hours. We talked about how horrible we are at meeting ladies, and our stubbornness in not necessarily trying that hard. I've said that I'm not doing the whole internet dating thing until I'm thirty, but I won't lie, I've been tempted to break that decree. But I love the theater so I'm back in. I mean, but I'm stubborn so I'm not breaking my word. I put some [Common Cloud] posters up in my room, so I guess it looks a little more like a home. I'm really, really over winter and in need of green grass. I seriously considered a spring break [!] road trip somewhere South of here, but my checkbook was disinclined to that thought. For Lent I have given up video games, because I was beginning to see a trend of a large amount of wasted time. Lynette mentioned something of a "positive fasting" - i.e. not just giving something up, but doing something productive. It's a really good idea, so next year..? Mostly because I have no idea what I would do towards that end right now. Maybe it could be that I'm more purposeful in my blogging, like the olden days. On that note, I have nothing else to write. you have my love.


The reason for my Chickenthug7 searching: Update this "quiz" from Pedro to Wilco. Why not.
Choose your favorite band and answer each question with titles from some of their songs.

Are you a male, or female: I'm the man who loves you
Describe yourself: I'm a wheel, Sunken treasure
How do some people feel about you: You are my face, We're just friends
How do you feel about yourself? Reservations, Misunderstood
Describe your ex-girlfriend/boyfriend: Outtasite (Outta mind)
Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend: In a future age, Someday soon
Describe where you want to be: Impossible Germany, Via Chicago
Describe what you want to be: Theologians
Describe how you live: I'm always in love
Describe how you love: My darling, Forget the flowers
Share a few words of wisdom: Christ for president, Say you miss me, War on war, Hell is chrome, Please be patient with me.