New year, new book

I finished two books within the last week. That hasn't happened in a while, so I feel like I should keep the momentum up. Last week I finished Kafka's The Trial and last night I finished Chuck Klosterman's novel Downtown Owl. Once I had finished the book, laid in bed for ten more minutes, thought about just going to bed, I tried to pick out the next book to read. After twenty minutes of looking at my bookcase I just wrote out a list and decided to put the decision up to a vote. I don't think I want to read an epic right now, but maybe the book after this next one. I might try to read on fiction and one non-fiction, but I often struggle to finish both books when I try to do that. So here are my options, I know there are a lot, so don't be overwhelmed - there's no pressure whatsoever. you have my love.

Fiction
River Why - Duncan
As I Lay Dying - Faulkner
Alice in Wonderland - Carroll
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man - Joyce
For Whom the Bell Tolls - Hemingway
Franny and Zooey - Salinger
The Road - McCarthy
Brave New World - Huxley
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest - Kesey

Non-fiction
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius - Eggers
Christ Plays in Ten Thousand Places - Peterson
Knowing God - Packer
Bill Bowerman biography
Ragamuffin Gospel - Brennan Manning
Imperial Ambitions - Chomsky
The Gospel According to America
Mere Christianity - C.S. Lewis
Life Together - Bonhoeffer

Epics
The Idiot - Dostoevsky
War and Peace - Tolstoy
East of Eden - Steinbeck

A good year for running

It was a good year in terms of running. I learned a lot, I ran a lot and I performed well. I keep track of training miles and was surprised to find out that I ran 76 times and 325 miles over the course of the year [for an average of four and a quarter miles per run]. And there have been times with huge gaps between runs. I didn't run for a month in late summer. I suppose training for and running a half marathon helped that high mileage. The half marathon was a lot of fun and I'm looking for another one this spring/early summer if you dare to join me. In October I ran the Trinity homecoming five-k, I had a goal of finishing near 24 minutes and amazed myself by running just under 23 minutes, though Graham still kicked my ass. And in November I ran the Living History Farms run and made my way through cold, mud, creeks and hordes of costumed runners. My time wasn't great, but it was a lot of fun, it would have been much better had any of my running buddies joined me. Next year, right?

Speaking of next year, I've been thinking of my running goals for oh-nine. Tentatively I want to run another half marathon and another race in the spring. Maybe a fifteen-k. And then hopefully I won't wuss out over the summer and keep my miles up. Then a couple of five-k's in the fall, plus another shot at the Living History Farms run.

I'm excited for the new year and I'm pretty sure that I can over five hundred miles next year if I stay healthy, motivated and not too busy. It'll be a great year if I do, but even just trying will make it a good year. I'm gonna make a sales pitch here: I used to hate running, I made the decision to start running for health reasons, I started with slow, short distances and grew to love it. Running has become a beautiful release and a way to spend more out in nature. So if you want to get in shape next year buy a good pair of shoes, start slow and with low mileage [as in, less than a mile and don't be afraid to walk], and I hope that you learning to enjoy it as much as I do. I hate selling stuff, but really - running is worth it. you have my love.

Also, don't forget to stretch. Though maybe not as much as Brandon.

Reflections on five years of ambiguity

It has been five years since I left Trinity, or at least five years since I wrote this. When I left [I fuzzily recall that] I had aspirations of seminary, instead I moved back to Iowa and experienced years of ambiguity, though fun ambiguity. I did go to seminary, and yet the ambiguity remained. Then back to Iowa, some more ambiguity, and then back to undergrad, and bam! less ambiguity. Sorry, I didn't like any of the synonyms for "ambiguity".

These past five years I've had a deep longing within me for a community such as I experienced at Trinity. I found bits and pieces of it in different places; in the small group at Stu and Alan's place, surprisingly at work, with my friends in Portland, with the Barker extended family, with my friends in Ames, and along the way some short resurrections of the community I had at Trinity. Just today there is hope in the air of our upcoming new year's eve party, and yet, it's a shadow of what used to be. Albeit a good shadow.

I may have learned a few things about community in the past five years. At Trinity we didn't really have to try to create a community, it just sort of happened. It was easy because we lived, ate, went to class, etc. together. We couldn't get rid of each other, and all it took was learning to forgive one another. But for the past few years I've learned that most of the time community doesn't just happen, it takes... it takes... it takes... what? What does it take? Maybe something more than what we have. But in the meantime it sure wouldn't hurt to offer up some hard work, some patience and more than a little dying to one's selfishness. But in the end it becomes something that you can't force to happen, it just appears and is goodness. Ambiguity.

In another five years I will be somewhere else and I have aspirations to not be asking these same questions at that point. Not that I will have them figured out, but maybe I will be more content. Five years ago I couldn't imagine what I would be doing now, but today I have a few thoughts on what might be in five years' time. I hope that's a good enough start. you have my love.

Ten Thousand

I was born ten thousand days ago. I know, it's both weird and awesome. When I discovered that I could calculate such data [and turned nine-thousand days old] I was living in Portland, attempting to discover the meaning of one's mid-twenties. Turning ten-thousand days old I find myself in Ames, attempting to discover the meaning of one's late-twenties. I don't think that there's much difference, other than a thousand days or so. I'm beginning to get the feeling that by the time I hit eleven-thousand days life will make a lot more sense. I look forward to those days, and yet I'm enjoying these days as well. Which is good considering the winter that we're about to go through - I'll need a positive disposition for several months of this frigidity. For celebration's sake I'll give you a sneak peek at my beard. you have my love.

The Contenders

Yesterday I called a clinic in hopes of setting up a visit, with further hopes of scoring some internship points along the way. It was as nerve-wracking as calling a girl. I left a voicemail but feel confident that I will hear back from them next week. It's a good first step. It would be really nice to find an internship that had the real possibility to turn into a job, so this process of finding an internship takes on a certain degree of seriousness in my little world. And since I'm making progress on this front I thought I would share what cities are in contention as possible internship sites. I have a list of pros and cons elsewhere, but feel as though that would be showing too much of my hand. The list, alphabetically:

Ames
Chicago
Des Moines
Freiburg
Grand Rapids
Kansas City
Minneapolis
New York City
Omaha
Portland

All fine cities. I've [not-very-seriously] thought about opening up bidding, with the most to offer winning my residence. So, let's start the bidding at potentiality of finding a girlfriend. Ready, go! you have my love.

A vegetarian failure

A couple of months ago I tried to be a temporary vegetarian. I knew it wouldn't last forever, but I thought it would have lasted longer than it did. I set the ground rule of fish products being okay, and I think I made it a week without meat. Then someone brought Korean barbecue to our small group. That was the beginning of the end. For several weeks after that I ate minimal amounts of meat, which I would say makes the experiment somewhat successful. I kept track of what I ate and thought I would share and objectify. you have my love.

Cy's Veggie Burger (B-), at the ISU Memorial Union food court, of course I did apply generous amounts of BBQ sauce to it. Actually I still order this when eating at the MU.
Pizza with onion, mushrooms and banana peppers (B), I get this from Papa John's, so I'm sure if you were to get it somewhere else it would be better. It's an excellent combo of toppings, quite tasty unless you're my faux-girlfriend-emeritus.
Amy's Chili (A), I get the spicy variety as to increase the production of gas. But really, it's very delicious.
Boca Burger (D-), not even Sweet Baby Ray and liberal amounts of his wonderful BBQ could salvage a Boca Burger.
Red beans, rice and salsa (B+), a simple mix for a cheap single college guy, and not pretty tasty to boot.
Not Italian Sausage Sandwich (A), I had this at Java Joe's in downtown Des Moines. It's fantastic and spicy. I wouldn't have been able to tell that it was meatless without the witty name.