How to surprise me

Several weeks ago I had a smile brought to my face when I found out that a couple of friends of mine threw each other surprise birthdays. For each other. Without knowing it. Now of course it wasn't the same night [which would have been incredible], but it was great to see them when they realized what was happening. Did I mention that they've been married to each other for four months or so. It was pretty funny.

Chris was slightly surprised, but he had some sort of intuition that something was going on. One week later [Chris had planned her party before he knew of his own] Katie was quite surprised. To date there have been two attempts to surprise me. The first was on my eighteenth birthday, whilst in Monterrey, Mexico on a trip with the youth group. My dear friend Monica, who at the time was really more of an acquaintance, attempted to distract me. However, my spidey senses kicked in and I figured out what was going on. I decided to not ruin it for everyone else by coming in through the back door, and it turned out to be a great birthday [including several pinatas!]. The second attempt was on my twentieth birthday. It was my Boston summer, and we happened to be in New Hampshire for a mid-summer retreat. There were only eight of us, so it was fairly easy for me to pick up the vibe that they were planning something for me. It was a nice little shindig, and happened to be my only time in that state, so I can add that to my list of states in which I've celebrated my birthday.*

It isn't that I hate surprises, I enjoy them - really, I do. However, I also really like unraveling mysteries, like puzzles, secrets, women and so forth. So I'm going to give you all some advice, in hopes that someday, someone might actually surprise me. This doesn't mean that I won't be putting aside my spidey senses though, so good luck.

One. Be really sneaky. This should go without saying, but honestly, if you don't put your best efforts forward I will figure it out. You can't pull a rookie mistake like parking too many recognizable cars nearby. You may need to not let some people into the secret until the party is really close.

Two. Emotionally distract me. This will ensure that I won't be on top of my sleuthing prowess. Options include, but are not limited to: getting into an argument with me, or in some way frustrating me. Or you could get a cute chica to flirt with me and make me believe that she actually has some interest in me. Note this though, if you use that second option and she actually doesn't have an interest in me I will probably hold it against you for a long, long time.

Three. Think outside the box. This has become a cliche, but seriously, avoid the norm. Throw me a birthday party a month early. Have it in a really random locale [Kentucky, Congo, etc.]. Invite people I don't know [for another day: I once went to a very poorly attended surprise party for someone I didn't know. It was one of the most awkward moments ever]. Invite all the people who dislike me, which would be about three or four people. Or better yet, invite all the girls I've ever liked - that would be... fun? No, that's not the word I was looking for. Weird - that's better. Get Jeff Tweedy or David Bazan to show up. Or have everyone dress up as woodland creatures and have the party be at a park. I'm sure you can come up with some even better ideas.

Some personal notes: today was great because: the weather was nice, I listened to a lot of Beatles songs and was in a rather goofy mood. I saw Wilco a couple of nights ago and it was fantastic - a lot of old songs, everyone in the band was acting silly and they were just downright amazing. The breaking news from last post: RyJo is engaged to be wed, thus allowing me to name myself Czar of the iEHBS [the new constitution passed] and Bob the High Judge. I had a late dinner with Josh, Angie and Naomi Smith last night; it was really good to see them before they made their way to L.A. I am loving the madness of March and am so excited for the tournament, enough so that my next post will be devoted to it. I'll try to post it before the selection, but will be pressed for time as I will be in Chicago this weekend - good times. That's it, embrace Spring if you are able. you have my love.

* No such list actually exists.