I'm not sure if I've ever made this public, but my main mechanism of defense is to run away. When things get tough, I get out. Case in point: the Portland experience. I moved out there because things were tough here, and I moved back because things were tough there. It occurs on the micro level as well; I avoid all sorts of conversations that might make me uncomfortable.
Lately I've been in the mood to prove myself wrong, so I decided to stop running away. I'm not entirely sure of my career path, but I've set my course. And that course may even take me to grad school. Again. I was frustrated with my living situation, but I decided that it was better to struggle amongst people than to live easily alone. And I've been thinking about how I need to get back into the proverbial fight regarding my faith. To a lesser degree I restarted reading "For Whom the Bells Toll," which I had given up on because at the time I was over-Hemingwayed. In regards to the micro, well. I haven't figured that out yet. I'll let you know how that goes. you have my love.
Post title taken from Damien Jurado's album of a similar name. You should listen to it.
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
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1 comment:
I had the same revelation when I was in China wanting to go home before it was time
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